Gift Getting

It’s now officially the Christmas season, so I spent quite a lot of time shopping this past week. Actually, the truth is that I drove my wife around to different stores and malls and watched her shop because she is the expert at selecting gifts for people. But hey, I carried the bags, so that’s something!

While we were shopping, my wife asked me several times what I wanted for Christmas. I know it would have made it easier on her if I simply gave her a few wish-list items, but I just couldn’t come up with anything. I thought about it a few more times during the week, but at this point in my life I’m really happy and pretty much have everything I need.

I know that last statement sounds cliché but I’ve discovered that our needs change as we get older. When I was a boy I wanted toys, and when I was a young adult I wanted a nice car, and in my forties I wanted a better home for my family. But at 64, I’ve got everything I could ever want and don’t feel the need to clutter up my life with any more material things, especially since I live in such a small house!

However, my wife kept asking me what I wanted because she loves to give gifts and she loves me. So I kept thinking about it along the lines of, you know, underwear, socks, a golf shirt or maybe some golf balls, and then it hit me. I know what I really want!

What I really want is a chance to spend a little time with my closest friends. Obviously, I want to spend time with my family as well over the holidays, but we already have that planned out and I know it will be great. But getting to see friends during the Holiday Season is a whole lot harder because everyone is always so busy. Then again, like everything else in life, if you want it bad enough, you figure out how to make it happen. So, I sat down and made out a list of friends and started putting down possible dates. I showed it to my wife and with her approval, I started sending out emails and text messages. I made a dinner date with Bill and Ruth, set up a golf game with my friend Paul, set up a round of golf in Temecula with Danny and Stacy, and a round of golf with Brad, Jeff, and Marvin in San Juan. And I also set up several other dinner dates and four other rounds of golf with assorted friends throughout the area. I couldn’t set up dates for everyone, but for those I don’t get to see, I will be writing a letter to them to remind them how much I appreciate their friendship.   

And that got me thinking… Making an effort to spend time with friends or writing them a letter of appreciation is a nice little gift. But maybe it’s not actually gift giving…maybe it’s more like “Gift Getting”!   

Love is, above all, the gift of one’s self.

~ Jean Anouilh