The Key

I was lying in bed last night trying to think of a good idea for a Monday Message and couldn't think of anything! It’s frustrating because I committed myself many years ago to write a short story or create some kind of positive message every Monday, but sometimes I just draw a blank.

However, I received my inspiration early this morning. I was at a Shopping Center in Irvine across from the UCI Campus, doing an ultrasonic pole inspection when I noticed the security guard approaching me. I often get questioned by security guards when I’m working, but I recognized this lady. She’s a bit older than most security guards, but the same tall, thin, woman I’ve seen at that Shopping Center every year. She appears to be a bit rough and tough, as most security guards need to be, but she also has a great smile.

I’ve never really said more than a few words to her, but today she recognized me and stopped to talk a bit. She asked me about my job, and I explained what I do and that I find it really fun and interesting, although also very challenging at times. She replied, “Yeah, my job is challenging too, but I don’t really like it so much. There are too many spoiled young kids in this area that go into Albertsons every week and steal things.” She went on to say, “It makes me both sad and mad, cause kids shouldn’t be that way.”

I agreed with her and suggested that maybe the parents were part of the problem. She laughed at that. But then she also mentioned that there’s a job she’s had her eye on for over a year. A better paying job with a private company. But she said she’s been too afraid to apply for it because she knows she’ll get turned down. My first response was, “How do you know if you don’t try?”

But then I started thinking… about something my wife said to me after we first got married. I was going through a really tough time, struggling over whether or not to take my business in a new direction, one that would be very risky, but that could also pay off in a big way. Debby said to me, “I read something recently that I think applies to your situation.” Her words of advice are shown below, and when I remembered her giving me that advice, I decided right then and there to share it with the security guard. She didn’t respond immediately, but after a few moments, I saw that bright smile appear and I knew I had an idea for a Monday Message.

“The door to my life is within me.

I hold the key. And no one else does.”

       ~ as told to me by Debby Thrailkill, circa 1995

Only One Thing to Fear

As a man, it’s embarrassing to admit that sometimes I get scared. I’ve always seen myself as this big, strong, tough guy, who ain’t afraid of nuthin! But last week, I got scared, super scared, three times!

The first time was Monday. I left my house in pitch-black darkness headed south to San Diego. At the first intersection I approached, I needed to turn left and the lights up ahead were all green. It was early, I was thinking about all the work I needed to get done, and I guess a bit distracted. As I started to turn left, I heard a noise, just a slight whisper of a sound. Not sure what it was but it woke me up to see that the left turn lane light was bright red… and a huge Sprinter Van was about to barrel head on into me. I swerved at the last second, narrowly avoiding a major collision, my heart absolutely beating out of my chest!

The second time was a few days later. My wife and I were at a friend's beautiful beach house that sits high above Strand’s Beach. The view of the ocean, looking down at the white sandy beach and rolling blue waves will take your breath away. However, the stone steps that lead down from the patio towards the beach are super steep and a bit treacherous. My wife and I were talking and laughing, but when I got up to go move the umbrella, I stepped awkwardly on the first step and started to fall backwards down the stone staircase. It all happened so fast, but it was like there was momentary pressure on my back, and somehow… I regained my balance. Had I fallen, I would have been very seriously injured, but instead I just stood there with my heart going a hundred miles an hour, scared out of my head once again!

The third time was Friday and a total precursor to Halloween. I had a big job to do in Camarillo, so I picked up my son, David, at 5:00am and headed north on the 5 freeway. It was dark out and traffic on the freeway was light, but my night vision isn’t so great these days. So after driving only a few miles, I heard a voice in my head saying you better clean your glasses. But when I put them back on, I noticed something that set my heart racing once again! A huge, nasty spider was hanging from a thin web only inches in front of my face. I screamed out to my son, immediately swerving over to the side of the road, and jumped out yelling SPIDER! My son bailed out of the truck but not before noticing the giant black arachnid just above the steering wheel. Somehow, despite my heart going crazy, I was able to grab a wad of napkins and “escort” the nasty creature out of my truck. But what was also scary was… if I fail when I go for him, that creature is going to hide somewhere in my truck, and I will have to live the rest of my life in fear of him!

And that got me thinking… about fear and failure. Where did that slight whisper, that momentary pressure, and that voice in my head that saved me from disaster come from? I’m not sure, but because I feel connected to God, I choose to believe that He is with me, helping me and guiding me at all times. I’m not saying that bad things won’t happen, they do. But more importantly, I don’t think I should ever live my life in fear or even worrying about failure for that matter, because in the Bible it says that there is only one thing we need to fear… failing to receive God’s grace.

Be careful that no one fails to receive God’s grace.

~ Hebrews 12:15

Change The World

I am not embarrassed to say that I am a hard worker. I always have been, and it has served me  well in my life. I think that’s why I admire “working class” people so much. In fact, I try to carry around $5 bills and In-And-Out Gift Cards with me everywhere I go so that when I catch someone working hard and/or doing the right thing, I can give them a small but usually meaningful reward. I also have to be a hard worker because my wife is a hard worker… and I can’t let her show me up!

At our house we share the chores. My wife does the laundry and being such a hard worker, she does the laundry almost every single day. My job is to help her and often times I will make the bed after she washes our sheets. And when I do, I make it right and pull it tight, in order for it to look perfect. I’m not really sure why I do that, but recently I read something written by a Navy Seal and it explains why making your bed is so important. Who knew!

"Every morning in basic SEAL training, my instructors (all Viet Nam veterans) would show up in our barracks room and the first thing they did was inspect your bed. If you did it right, the corners would be square, the covers pulled tight, the pillow centered just under the headboard, and the extra blanket folded neatly at the foot of the rack - that’s Navy talk for bed.

It was a simple mundane task. But every morning we were required to make our bed-to-perfection.  It seemed ridiculous at the time, particularly in light of the fact that were aspiring to be real battle-hardened warriors, but the wisdom of this simple act has been proven to me many times over.

If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day.  It will give you a small sense of pride and it will encourage you to do another task and another and another. By the end of the day, that one task completed will have turned into many tasks completed. Making your bed will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter. Let’s face it, if you can’t do the little things right, you will never do the big things right. And, if by chance you have a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made, that you made… that gives you the encouragement that tomorrow will be better.

Bottom line, if you want to change the world, start off by making your bed!”

So… this morning I made the bed! Then I stopped and looked at my wife and a thought came to my mind. If you truly find the right person to share your life with, and you make it your goal to treat them with perfection, you just might change their world!

Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.

~ Aristotle