The Power of Love

Thirty years ago, I read a book that dramatically changed my life for the better. The “Greatest Secret in the World” contained 10 secret scrolls that were guidelines to live by and you were supposed to read each scroll 3x a day for a month in order to absorb the information into your subconscious. I followed those instructions and found that it worked for me and those guidelines have been a part of my life ever since.

Last week, I was showing the book to a friend and afterwards I decided that it might be a good idea for me to go through a “refresher course”. So, I decided to read each scroll three times a day for a week over the next 10 weeks. I started Monday with the first scroll that begins, “I will greet each day with love in my heart.” The essence of that scroll is to greet everyone you meet by saying silently to yourself, “I love you.” And letting that love show through your actions and words, which is not necessarily an easy thing to do!

Sure enough, I was tested on Tuesday. If you live at the beach and have a carport instead of a garage, you shouldn’t own a black truck. But being not so very brilliant, that’s what I own. Every day it’s covered with sea salt spray and needs to be constantly washed. So Tuesday I went to a Chevron Station with a drive through car wash. As I was pulling in, a man came rushing out on foot with a receipt in hand. Instantly I knew that something was wrong and as I turned the corner I could see his car stopped at the controller, with only wife and dog still in the car. It was about 10 minutes before the driver came back with a new receipt and for the next 5 minutes he tried to punch in the info but couldn’t get it to work. I’m getting bummed because I need to get to an appointment. Eventually his wife gets out of the car with the receipt in hand and as she walks by me I roll down my window and offer to help. She responds with a dirty look and storms off to the front of the gas station. Another 5 minutes goes by and now I am really worried about being late, so I get out and walk up to the guy’s car. Fortunately, I have read scroll #1, so with love in my heart, I ask the man very politely, “Do you need help? I’ve noticed that sometimes the code numbers are hard to read.” He says no, my wife is handling it. At that point, I gently suggested he drive through the car wash opening and then get back in line because there are four cars behind him that have been waiting a long time. The guy rudely ignored my suggestion, rolled up his window and basically blew me off.

As I walked back to my truck, I felt pretty good about how I handled the situation. I was kind, I was polite, and I offered my sincere help. But most importantly, because of Scroll #1, I didn’t tell the guy to “F#&%@#&*off”, like I really wanted to. Did the guy do the right thing, no! Did I do the right thing, yes! And for the rest of the day I felt pretty good until the next morning when I woke up and saw once again how dirty my truck was and decided… I might have love in my heart, but what I really need is a brain in my head!

I will greet each day with love in my heart, 

for this is the greatest secret of success in all ventures. 

Muscle can split a shield and even destroy life, 

but only the unseen power of love can open the hearts of men.

~ Og Mandino

The Wrong Room

For over 40 years I’ve been an entrepreneur and have absolutely loved it. There’s something about creating a business from scratch, overcoming obstacles, finding ways to grow it, and then finally seeing it reach a successful level that is very satisfying. In my case, I’ve started three lighting companies in three different business sectors, maintenance, engineering, and distribution and through the grace of God (and also some hard work) all three eventually became very successful. Even though all three companies were quite different, all three shared certain “business principles” that were integral to their success. One of the most important principles involves people, or should I say the choices we make about people.

As far back as High School, I realized that the people I associated with were either going to drag me down or lift me up. The smokers, drinkers, and druggies had zero ambition, so I didn’t enjoy their company, and I certainly didn’t learn anything from them. On the other hand, I was also unable to relate to the super smart people because they were just a little too nerdy for me. So instead, I sought out interesting people who had their own unique dreams and goals and were willing to work for them like I knew I was. Little did I know that my decision to seek out the right people back then, would be a guiding principle for the rest of my life, both in business and in personal relationships.

Recently I started a fourth company in a completely different industry. It involves manufacturing a unique product that is sold to companies that build solar parking canopies. I am not familiar with the Solar Industry and I don’t know anyone who is involved in that industry, so I am truly starting from scratch on this one. But one of the first things I will do is find the right people to connect with, people who are intelligent, experienced, and knowledgeable in areas where I am lacking. If I can find the right people to surround myself with, I can find success a lot faster, and probably enjoy the experience a lot more.

I thought about that business principle last night as I was talking to my 19 year old grandson.  We had a "Family Taco Party" for him because he's leaving tomorrow to head back to college. He will be a junior this year and has chosen business as his major, but more importantly, he's at a point in his life where choosing his friend is also going to be one of the most important decisions he will ever make. I told him that I was glad he was taking business classes and that if he ever needed help or advice to please call me. I also gave him a quick bit of unsolicited but highly relevant advice, "When it comes to business, or people, or people in business, the choices you make will determine the path you take." Choose wisely!

If you’re the smartest person in the room, 
you’re in the wrong room.

~ Confucius

I think SpongeBob might be talking about me!

Really Small Things

My wife and I are planning on taking a vacation to Kauai this coming September. We’ve gone on vacation there quite a few times and absolutely love it...and why not, it’s a true taste of happiness!

We typically stay in a vacation rental home that either has a golf course view or an ocean view. The ocean views are breathtaking in Kauai where the water seems to be so much more spectacularly blue than anywhere else. The Makai golf course on the north shore is also spectacular with over a dozen ocean view holes and pristine white sand bunkers that are as pretty as the white sand beaches. Most of the rental homes come with surfboards, boogie boards, bicycles, and beach chairs, so you have all the things you need to enjoy this warm tropical paradise. Let me tell you, it’s such a great vacation spot that I found myself lying in bed last Saturday morning, just dreaming about being there.

But here’s the funny thing. When I woke up that morning and told my wife that I had been dreaming about Kauai, she asked me, “What’s your favorite memory of our vacations there?” I had to think about it for a while. I could have said, “Well of course it’s when we honeymooned in Kauai. Or I could have mentioned the time that I played 60 holes of golf on my 60^th birthday at Makai Golf Course. Or I could have picked our long romantic walks along gorgeous “Secret Beach”.  Or when we hiked over 5 miles on the Napali Coast Line to a secluded waterfall. There are absolutely dozens of memories I could have picked, but I got distracted with a phone call and never actually answered her question.

It just so happens, last Saturday my oldest daughter got married and headed off with her new husband to Hawaii for their honeymoon. While they were gone, my wife and I took care of her two small children. On Thursday they attended a camp at The Ocean Institute in Dana Point and afterwards we decided to walk around the nearby shopping center and look for an ice cream parlor. We walked around for quite a while before finally stumbling onto the perfect place. It’s called, “Lappert’s Ice Cream” and the reason it’s perfect is because it’s the answer to my wife’s question. My favorite memory of Kauai is when we would walk over to the North Shore Village and get a double scoop of Lappert’s Ice Cream in a waffle cone. I know, it sounds like a really small thing, compared to surfing, swimming, bicycling, golfing, and all that. But sometimes it’s the really small things that make the best memories. And let me explain why this memory is so special. Whenever I think about eating ice cream in Kauai, I picture my wife and I sitting on the block wall out front, holding hands, laughing, smiling and just, you know, being in love. And Thursday, as I watched my wife smiling at our grandkids with her cute little dimples, I fell in love with her all over again. And I learned something. Sometimes that taste of happiness you’re seeking is right there in your own back yard!

We do not remember days, we remember moments.

~ Cesare Pavese