Forgetness

I know it’s not a word, but maybe it should be.  The “Forgetness” I refer to above is not related to forgetfulness, although that is an ongoing problem I’ve been having lately. It is in fact, related to  “Forgiveness” which can surely be a complicated concept at times. I received a reminder of that yesterday.

The text message was from a young man I hadn’t seen or heard from in years. He asked for my email address and mentioned something about a long-ago conversation, and how he might have been wrong. That got my curiosity going!

He started the email saying, “I know this note comes out of the blue.” He then went on to say, “I recently went through the book of Luke and noticed something I hadn’t caught before. I think God may be tapping me on the shoulder.”

His email went on to explain. “We had a conversation many years ago while waiting to make a customer presentation. It was about Jim (not his real name). I don’t remember the details of what he did, but seem to recall it was about claiming to own a piece of the company, which he was not entitled to. You said something about never forgiving him, and I replied something to the effect that “you must forgive him” Anyway, after reading the bible verse (below) I realized that Luke is saying that if he repents then he must be forgiven.  I surely don’t have all the answers on this topic, but I recalled our conversation and think you might have felt judged by me - which was not my intent. I simply wanted to give you the truth, for your well-being.  The reality is there are tons of scriptures about forgiveness and it’s not always perfectly clear when to let go, and when to set boundaries, or even when to cut someone off.  I am sorry if I offended you then. I hope you and your family are well.”

Funny how a simple conversation more than 12 years ago, can find it’s way back into my life at a time when I really need to remember it. I wrote back saying I wasn’t offended at all. In fact, I appreciated his perspective at the time because it helped me to make a decision that I still believe is right today. That decision… the concept of “Forgetness”… to forget about the wrongs done to you, so they won’t continue to hurt you, but to forgive the person if they ever truly show remorse. Perhaps a simple solution to a complicated problem.

So watch yourselves. If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.”                ~ Luke 17 vs 3-4