Mixed Emotions

I always have mixed emotions around this time of year. I love that Valentines Day is coming up February 14^th, because it gives me the opportunity to do something romantic for my wife. But February 12^th is the day my father passed away and although it has been nearly 14 years I still remember that day like it was yesterday.

Losing my dad was devastating because he had always been my rock and my best friend and I loved him very much. Fortunately I did not have to face that situation alone. I had a loving wife who was at my side at the hospital, every day for six months. And when my Dad took his final breath, I was holding his hand…and she was holding mine. I will never forget her support when I needed it most and I hope she knows that she will always have mine.

Going through a difficult situation is typically when you find out whether or not your love is real. Tough times can threaten a lot of relationships, but if your love is cemented with respect and admiration, and if you understand that love means giving more than taking, your relationship can be strengthened instead of destroyed.

Recently I came across a note I wrote to my wife right after I learned my Dad was terminally ill. It wasn’t a Valentines Letter, but it was a letter celebrating our love. I hesitate to share it, because it is so personal, yet it does seem appropriate for a Valentine’s Message.

A copy of the letter is below……

One word frees us from all of the weight and pain of life;

That word is love.

~Sophocles

 

 

 

 

February 1^st, 2001

Dear Debby,

I Now Know

There is a very difficult situation that lies ahead. That it will be particularly hard on me and that I will need your help, your love, and your utmost patience. I will be strong for I am a warrior. Whether or not I make it through this situation is not even a question, because with you, I know I can make it through anything. Although I do not know what lies ahead or what the future holds, I do know that you have always been there for me, to listen, to talk, to share, and to love with all of your heart…..as I love you with all of mine. We will get through this….together!

My Wish For Us

That we will continue to share new interests and adventures

And allow each other the freedom to develop as individuals.

That our faith won’t be shaken by occasional feelings of hurt or anger.

That we will continue to acknowledge our differences openly,

And see them as opportunities to learn and grow closer.

That we will find in each disagreement the patience to listen,

The courage to trust, and the strength to forgive.

That we will find in each difficult situation that plaques our lives,

The wisdom to work together, to find the right answers.

May We Never Forget

The qualities that first attracted us to each other

And how much we still appreciate them.

To always inspire each other, applauding successes,

Nurturing strengths, believing in each other’s dreams,

And working as one to make them come true.

 

May We Always

 Look into each other’s heart and see the love that binds us.

 

Love,

Joseph