Handcuffs & Headaches

Once a week I visit an elderly lady friend of mine and we go for a walk around Woodbridge Lake. Pao Chi Chen might be 89 years old but she still loves to walk and be outdoors observing nature. She also loves to observe people as well, but not in a judgmental way. She is a truly caring person with intense insight and exponential wisdom wrought from years of hardship and struggle (not to mention living in seven countries and learning to speak five languages). She loves people and they must love her because half the people we pass by know her and wave and say hi to her. Maybe that is why she is always smiling.

 

Sometimes when we go for a walk (okay every time we go for a walk) my cell phone rings. I try not to take calls because I want to focus on my friend, but recently I asked Pao Chi if she ever thought about getting a cell phone. She laughed and smiled and said, “I do not like headaches.” Pao Chi does not own a cell phone, a computer or even a fax machine. She has never been on the internet, never texted, tweeted or emailed. She has never “friended” or “liked” or seen a Facebook page and has absolutely no idea what I mean when I refer to social media, yet she is supremely happy and at peace with the world… and you can see it in her beautiful smile.

 

That got me thinking about how much life has changed over the last 50 years. My happiest moments as a child and even as a teenager did not involve an electronic device. One particularly fond memory I have is waking up real early on a Saturday morning and hiking to a nearby lake with my dog. We came over a hill in a heavily wooded area and the wild green grass was so tall that my dog disappeared into it. He started barking at me and we both started running through the wet grass, down the hill, with him jumping up into the air so he could find me as we ran and me laughing at how silly he looked. It was fun and it was funny and yet nobody captured it with a cell phone video. Darn!

 

It seems like young people today are absolutely handcuffed to electronic devices 24/7. I guess they have to be because that’s the way the world operates now, but are they better off? I’m not sure, but most of the time when I see them….they don’t seem to be smiling. Maybe they have headaches!
 

I keep the telephone of my mind open to peace, harmony, health and love. 

Then, whenever doubt, anxiety or fear try to call me, they keep getting a busy signal -

and soon they'll forget my number.

~ Edith Armstrong

Powers of Observation

I like to think I’m a fairly “observant” person. By that I mean I try to watch, listen and notice what’s going on around me including paying attention to the people I’m with. But sometimes I fail because I get distracted by worries or the myriad of technology that we all have to interact with daily. My wife struggles with the same issue because she works two jobs and between our four children and six grandchildren, there is always something or someone needing her attention. In fact I kid her about it a lot, like when I gave her roses recently…and she walked right by without noticing them! But then….all that changed on Saturday!

 

Saturday was a very stressful day for both of us. My wife had to host a six hour Annual Meeting for the South County Outreach and I had to give a motivational speech in the morning and then shoot 3 hours of video for a new website our company is developing. So by 3:00pm Saturday we were both exhausted. When we arrived home, all we wanted to do was go outside, sit on the patio and enjoy the ocean view. Unfortunately the weather wasn’t cooperating. It was cold and windy with extremely rough water.

 

After sitting down for only a few minutes my wife said she saw something way out in the ocean. She said it looked like a seal or maybe a person and she asked me to get our binoculars. I took a look and saw what appeared to be a man about a quarter mile out in the ocean, bobbing in the water. He wasn’t swimming and he wasn’t waving his arms for help, but something didn’t look right. My wife was already dialing 911 before I even finished telling her what I saw. She had them immediately patch her through to the Dana Point Harbor Patrol.

 

In the meantime, I grabbed my Paddleboard and started running towards the water. When I reached the shoreline I hesitated. I still had street clothes on and the water was extremely rough and cold, but I didn’t know how long it would take for the Rescue Boat to get there, so I knew I had to try to do something. It felt like it took forever to get through the waves and paddle out to the man but it was probably only 15 minutes. By the time I got there the Sheriff’s Rescue Boat was also arriving. I called out to the man but he was unresponsive and not moving. Fortunately he had on a Life Vest so his head was above water. When the two Sheriffs grabbed him by the vest and pulled him onto their boat he looked ashen and was obviously suffering from hypothermia. The Rescue Boat took off and I spent the next hour fighting the wind and waves to get back to the shore.

 

When I finally did get back home my wife asked me if the man was okay and I had to give her the bad news, that it didn’t look good. But we got great news an hour later when the phone rang and a Sheriff told me to thank my wife for calling in because her quick response saved the man’s life. He had been in the water for over three hours and was extremely hypothermic. Any longer and he probably would have died. I will never call my wife “unobservant” again!



February 8, 2014 - Dana Point Sheriffs rescue man after 3 hours in the water

It is only when we silence the blaring sounds of our daily existence that we can finally hear the

whispers of truth that life reveals to us, as it stands knocking on the doorsteps of our hearts.

  ~ K.T. Jong

A Question of Compassion

With the Super Bowl yesterday and it being February already, the “Holiday Season” is officially over. Personally I love the holidays, giving thanks at Thanksgiving, sharing gifts at Christmas, and celebrating New Years in January gives us a chance to spend time with friends and family and show our love for each other. Giving thanks, sharing gifts and celebrating a new year feels good, as it should. But should it ever…..really….be over? A friend of mine recently reminded me otherwise.

Joe, you always take time to write and share, so I thought I would reciprocate. I sent this message to my Wife and Son as an FYI. Hope you get something out of it. Mike

While filling up my gas tank last week I was approached by a disheveled man asking for spare change. Although I gave my standard "No" reply, (I'll get to the reason why in a bit), there was something about this man that made me stop and think. He was about the same age as me, same height, and in good physical condition (although desperately needing a bath and a shave). I looked past the rough exterior and thought to myself, “This guy should be producing in society. Cleaned up with decent clothes, he could easily get a good job.”  He was also well spoken, polite and thanked me in spite of my negative look and negative answer.

The reason I always say “No!” is because I know what happens….these individuals buy Booze or drugs! However, this time I seconded guessed my gut and went back to the man with a small amount of money. “Be honest with me. If I give you money are you going to buy booze?” Without hesitation he said, “Yes sir, I am going to buy booze.” He was shaking as he answered me and said he needed to satisfy the craving in his body. I looked him square in the eye and said, “That’s why I usually say no, but this one time, I’m going to give you this money and hope you use it for something good. He said, “God Bless you sir, I will.” and we parted.

I know there are thousands of people out there who have potential… but yet are really struggling.  I wish I could have offered that man a job instead of a meager Del Taco meal but at least I didn’t turn my back on him.

I learned two very important lessons from this gas station encounter. 1) Always go with my gut. 2) There has to be a better way to help people like this get their lives turned around. Maybe there is… but I fear too many of them have sunk so low they’ve lost all faith and spirit and no longer desire to function in society. Most of them, I fear, are just anxiously waiting until it’s all over. A man without faith and spirit is truly a lost soul.  

Mike’s letter reminded me that compassion for our fellow man shouldn’t end when the holiday season ends. We’ll never know what that man did with the money Mike gave him, but we do know what Mike did with his!



Whoever has this world’s goods and see his brother

in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does

the love of God abide in him? My little children let

us not love in word or tongue, but in deed and in truth.

~ 1 John 3:17, 18

Perfect Purpose

I try to keep my Monday Messages relevant by writing about things that happen each week. In order to do that I have to pay attention to my surroundings and the people I come in contact with; focusing on things I see or hear that challenge my thinking. It’s actually good for me because when I was young I only focused on myself and that’s probably true for most young people but if we do that we might miss out on some amazingly awesome sights and some incredibly interesting people. Here are a few examples from last week….along with some fun facts!

On Friday my wife and I babysat two of our grandchildren. As I looked down at our little 9 month old granddaughter, I noticed how perfect her tiny fingers and toes were and I was reminded how amazing the human body is. The average human body contains over 20 square feet of skin and is made of up over twenty-seven trillion living cells. If you tried to count them at the rate of 1 per second it would take you over 100,000,000 years to finish. Each cell is unique as is each living person. I wonder how we became made so perfectly?

 

 

Saturday was a beautiful, warm sunny day so my wife and I laid out at the beach. Looking up I noticed our sun is extremely large. In fact it makes up 98% of the mass of our solar system and is so big that you could fit over one million earths inside of it. The most incredible thing is the precision of its distance from the earth. If it were even one mile closer we would melt and if it were farther away we would freeze. I wonder how it got to be positioned so perfectly?

 



On Sunday evening my wife and I went for a moonlight bicycle ride along Beach Road. The moon plays a super important role in our lives. It regulates our seasons by stabilizing the tilt of the earth’s axis. If it wasn’t positioned with a one-and-a-half-degree tilt our oceans would slosh like bathwater at the mercy of a playful child. Basically, the moon keeps the earth habitable for us. I wonder how it got tilted so perfectly?



 

I know that not everything or everyone is this world is perfect… far from it. But when I take the time to notice the perfection in the simple things around me, I have no doubt that we and our world were created with perfect purpose!

And God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.

And then there was evening, and then there was morning - the sixth day

~ Genesis 1:31

I Got A Feeling

All week long I could not come up with a subject to write about for a Monday Message. Sunday came and I still didn’t have an idea or a story and I started to panic. I don’t know if it was writers block or just a “feeling” that I had that I should wait. So I waited until Monday evening and I am glad I did!

 

Earlier today I played in a Charity Golf Tournament to raise money for a Christian School and I met someone who really impressed me. His name is Sean Rooney and he gave me a great story to write about when he reminded me that sometimes we get a “feeling” that we just can’t ignore.

 

Sean is 27 and a former professional baseball player drafted by the Washington Nationals in 2006. His career was on the rise as he quickly moved from A Ball to Double A to Triple A and could practically smell the fresh cut grass on the field at Nationals Park Stadium when something happened that would change his life forever. His father, Bill, and older brother, Patrick, were tragically killed in a plane crash in Steamboat Springs, CO. They were traveling back from a trip where they were renovating a rustic barn for the reception site of Sean’s wedding, which was to take place in the upcoming September. His family was extremely close so the pain of unexpectedly losing two loved ones at the same time was extremely hard to bear. Sean began to question his life, wondering if devoting all his attention to baseball was still the right thing to do. He told me he had a “feeling” that something needed to change and that he prayed about it for a long time.

 

As he prayed for guidance, his love for the Lord increased and his desire to pursue the Big League Dream began to subside. After Sean played for AAA Syracuse in 2010, he told the Washington Nationals that he was going to leave the game knowing and trusting that God would place him where he could be most impactful. I am sure the coaching staff thought he was crazy to walk away from such a lucrative and exciting career but Sean had a “feeling” that he was on the right path. Today Sean is the Director of High School Ministry for FCA Baseball (Fellowship of Christian Athletes) and leads Bible Study Classes for youth baseball players at several local High Schools. Instead of igniting the crowd with a Home Run Sean ignites the hearts of young men and women all over Southern California with a love for God. His new career may not pay as much as the old one, but the ultimate payoff is priceless!

 





A bend in the road is not the end of the road, unless you fail to make the turn.

~ William Faulkner

The Happy Man

Last week I wrote about “The Angry Man” and it was a depressing story to write just like it’s depressing to be around angry people. Fortunately I am surrounded by happy people most of the time and they make my world a lot brighter.  One person in particular stands out.

 

His name is Kai and although he is a fairly new employee at our company, he has already made a very positive impact. Kai is young and just starting his career in the business world but he has all the right attributes to be successful. He comes to work every day with a great attitude and a willingness to do whatever is asked of him with a smile. His job involves assisting in many different areas of the company including purchasing, accounting, order desk, warehouse and shipping, so it can be really confusing and stressful at times. But he always seems happy and enjoying the work at hand. It doesn’t hurt that he produces great results either. That makes me smile and very happy that we hired him.

 

But Kai doesn’t stop with just spreading happiness at work. He goes out in the community seeking ways to help others. His latest project is called “Laundry Love” and it involves going to poor areas of the community where there are homeless or jobless people and helping them by doing their laundry. Kai and his group of volunteers don’t just pay for the laundry service, they spend time connecting with the people and listening to their concerns. Kai says that people down on their luck appreciate other people spending time with them more than they do their money. Imagine that!

 

I know it’s easier to be happy when things are going right than it is when things are going wrong. And I certainly don’t want to downplay the really difficult things that can happen to us in life. But the way I look at it…happiness comes from pro-active action. If we strive to focus on the positive and seek out ways to bring joy to others….we can’t help but brighten our own world. 
 

Happy people bursting with energy have three things in common.

They deeply honor and respect themselves, they completely accept

themselves for who they are and they don’t take themselves too seriously.

They also see challenges as opportunities to be creative. They switch

their negative thoughts as rapidly as they switch channels on their TV.

Because they see life as a game to be played and enjoyed, they radiate

good health. They are fun to be around and genuinely love and accept

other people for who they are.

~ Rev. Don Kutz, First Christian Church, Laguna Woods, CA



 

The Angry Man

I’ve been accused of being an overly positive person at times, maybe even a little naïve. And that’s okay because it’s true. My glass isn’t half full…its three-quarters full! Unfortunately, every once in a while something happens that tips my glass and makes me lose just a little bit of my faith in my fellow man. Fortunately, nothing will ever drain my “pitcher of positivity” completely.  

 

Yesterday (Sunday morning at 6:40am) I received a long rambling angry text message telling me what a horrible person I am. Ouch! First, the sender started detailing all the things that are wrong in his life; how bad his ex-wife is, how he doesn’t get to see his kids, how unfair everyone is to him, how his job sucks and he has no money and then he proceeded to tell me how I need to pull my head out of my “you know what” and start helping him instead of ignoring him. His words were extremely harsh and ended with a physical threat. I have to admit I’ve never received a message like that before and hope I never do again because it’s really sad. It’s sad because the man sending the message sees everyone else in the world as the problem instead of looking at the truth about himself.

Isn’t it true that we have a choice as to how we look at our own lives. Everyone struggles at times and everyone suffers. We all go through hard times because life isn’t fair…and it isn’t supposed to be. I’ve certainly had my share of hard times and I’ve certainly made my share of mistakes, and guess what I learned….most of the hard times I’ve ever had were caused by my own mistakes! That realization has enabled me to turn my mistakes into lessons learned and perhaps come out a little smarter on the other side. So as crazy as it sounds, I am thankful for the hard times I’ve encountered in my life. They’ve made me smarter and stronger and proven to me that God really does have a plan for me as long as I am honest with myself and maintain my faith in Him. Also, it doesn’t hurt to have a positive attitude along the way either. By that I mean…if we focus on all the positive things in our lives instead of the negative ones…we can find happiness no matter what our circumstances are.

So I am wondering how I should answer the angry man. I could suggest he take a long honest look at himself before blaming everyone else for his problems. Or I could offer up a cliché like…”What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. Or I could simply explain that making life better usually starts when we work on making ourselves better first. Or maybe…I just need to find him, put my arms around him, and let him know that I care deeply about him… and be bluntly honest with him that there truly is only one person with the power to fix his problems.

Oh, my friend, it's not what they take away from you that counts. 

It's what you do with what you have left.

~ Hubert Humphrey